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Emerging from dark and painful days, unbreakable soul – Mantsha Pheeha

Mantsha PheehaIn 2002 as a student engineer, Eskom refused to give me vacation work because I had been failing and that year they suspended my bursary.

I was so frustrated; I spent two months at home and I had no salary at a time when I needed it the most.

I carried the financial burden of my unpaid fees and the required registration fee for the following year whilst I still had to grapple with yet another year of failing.

The future looked dark and I spent most of those holidays praying and fasting with 4 guys who are now pastors.

Today as an engineer and pastor I know that the difficult time was preparing me for this work I am entrusted with, an eternal work.

If you are stuck just seek God in the word and prayer. God truly is faithful to His word.

If you have failed or have no money for fees just turn your heart to Jesus; the author and finisher of our faith.

I also remember how during those times of failing engineering at Wits I gave my all to the ministry and to being a leader in the body of Christ.

Ministry was the only thing that was going well for me, it was the one thing I felt I was good at.

One of the most painful days of that period was when I was called Fire and Bohani Hlungwane was called Power because we didn’t want to let go of being leaders in the student ministry, and rumor was that, we are failing because we are focusing on the ministry and not academics (by the way Bohani was not even failing).

I cried and was inconsolable.

So if you are passing and there are some people in your circle who are failing please be considerate. Support and encourage them.

As I end this day of reflection allow me to share just one last piece.
I entered the world of work with a lot of esteem and confidence issues.
Failing at Wits had taught me that I was not good enough and that somehow I do not even deserve to be a Chemical Engineer.
I lived with the constant feeling of being a con; that maybe I just would never crack it as a professional. I didn’t speak up in meetings and I never put my hand up for anything.
Again the constant reading of the Word of God changed that about me.
Learning that I am the head and not the tail; placed above only and not beneath; I have the mind of Christ.
It was the word that transformed my mind and changed me to see myself as God sees me. This particular journey in my life took years to complete.
So if you are beginning to doubt yourself because of your academic struggles again just run to the Word.

The road ahead of us is much longer than the one behind us!

By Pastor Mantsha Pheeha, Bachelor of Science (BSc), Chemical Engineering ( University of the Witwatersrand).

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2 Comments

  1. taylor

     /  December 28, 2014

    loud and clear. she’s talking to me

    Like

    Reply

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